Just when everyone was giggling and Leo was getting red with rage, Magneto and Mystic came in and took the recovering Kenny hostage.
Magneto yelled "Make one move and HE dies!!". Wolverine, Cyclops, Storm and the kids with the newly discovered powers glanced at each other and decided Kenny was a necessary sacrifice and they all lunged at Magneto. Kenny squealed and turned into a salivating mutant pig again. And Xavier goes" Oh crap! So much for the waster effort in making him normal again! But then come to think of it he's more useful as a pig than he was before....hmmm".
Magneto grapped Kenny and he and Mystique lavitated out of the hole they had created in the lab roof and disappeared.
Just when they were wondering what to do something small and shiny whizzed past after them. It was Leo...he had gone after the enemies! Then another there was a mushroom shaped poof and Ju whizzed after Leo saying " Wait up Lolly!". Of course at this point Su wouldn't let herself be let out of this. So she used her telepathic abilities to use Xavier as a floating surfer board, stepped on his paralyzed back and flew up after them. All this happened within a matter of seconds leaving the rest of the X-Men astounded.
The X-Men followed the vagrants in their X-Men craft with Storm bellowing " You are not authorized to use Mr Doctor Professor Xavier as a surfboard. Repeat: You are not authorized to use Mr Doctor Professor Xavier as a surfboard. Only his mother can." Su ignored them and continued gliding on Xavier who had fainted when Su tripped over his bald head and it knocked against the metal door, in her haste to follow her siblings.
Upon reaching Magneto's lair, Magneto chuckled and extended his magnetic force field on Kenny with the result that Kenny started retching and gasping and morphing into an even bigger giant Pig headed mutant with a serious gas problem. Magneto donned a female pig costume complete with MAC makeup, ribbon and Chanel N5 and a Prada Bag which he had snitched from his grandmother while she was out Bungee jumping. Then he pranced seductively in front of Pig-Kenny and Pig-Kenny drooling over his object of desire rampaged,thrashed and obliterated everything within sight just to reach her(Oh the sly tranny Magneto!).
Mystic was one of the first casualties of the mindless stomping. When Leo, Ju and Su arrived, followed by the X-Men( Storm still blaring bimbotically) Magneto pranced around them so that Pig-Kenny stampeded wildly in their direction spattering his toxic slime everywhere. Pig-Kenny knocked Wolverine and Cyclops out of the way and squashed Storm. He puckered at Jean Grey and in disgust she fled. He was about to step on Leo when Su got in the way to defend her brother and got squished and splinched all over. Ju had meanwhile absorbed Storm's powers so she used her new found lightning powers to strike Pig-Kenny again and again.
Everytime she struck Pig-Kenny he let out a huge, massive, universal rip that blasted everything within its range to smithereens and emitted the foulest smelling gas ever( like a concoction of garbage, rotten durian, armpit sweat and decaying pig).
Something unusual happened at that point. Every time a Solar Eclipse happens, unknown to most Scientists who assume that it is the result of the moon temporarily blocking the sun, something magical happens. People start seeing the inner beauty of even the ugliest things and fall in love with them. That is why during a solar eclipse you can see Victoria's Secret Models with blindfolds on to stop them from falling in love with ugly freaks climbing over their gates(once George Bush was one of these idiots).
The Solar Eclipse in actual fact happens when E.T( yes our beloved E.T with those huge, sad bulging eyes that take up 90 percent of his face) cycles magically over the Sun with his enormous, obese blob of an alien mother in his front basket. He would toil and scrape and howl against the strain and when they pass over the Sun his massive alien mother's gigantic body eclipses the sun. This may go on for a couple of hours since E.T sweats more than ever in front of the sun.
Now the funny thing was that, at the moment the Eclipse happened, Pig-Kenny let out a particularly loud and ear splitting fart which snaked its way up to the Eclipse i.e E.T's monstrous pile of obesity and both E.T and his Eclipsing mother were stunned and they started falling. They fell and fell and fell until they landed with a loud thwack on Magneto's Lair which was reduced to debris. The duelling inhabitants managed to get out just in time( even Pig-Kenny when he followed Magneto out). At the time Pig-Kenny emerged from the debris and saw E.T's fat momma, he immediately fell in love with her and she him. The blob motioned her lumpy finger at Pig-Kenny and beckoned and they ran( well she crawled) into each other's arms.
Since Pig-Kenny had found his new, real love, and found out magneto was not even a real swine to begin with, he kicked Magneto into a pulp and together they rode off into the sunset and all was well again. And not to forget Su who regenerated and Storm( The Bimbo),may she rest in peace...
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